NSW Nordic Ski Club

The Fashion Life of Wasza

Paul Campbell-Allen, 1999

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Our Wasza was a racer as everybody knows
Dressed up in his lycra suit from head down to his toes
In colours red and yellow, a slinky sort of blue
The Aussie flag on his back, fair dinkum through and through.

He likes the wrap-round image of Oakley Super shades
Suits the look, fast and slick of flashing roller blades
Team Nordic blazoned on his cap in striking white and blue
He?ll sell you one for fifteen bucks, though they only cost him two.

A techno freak from way back,. Wasza loves the gear
Carbon fibre poles and skis, a T shirt with NO FEAR,
Anything to get the edge, to gain than extra glide,
Waxing bench and iron hot always by his side.

A modest man is Wasza despite his flashy suit -
Like a body condom, with panty line to boot
His windproof jock the envy of every racing stud
Quick release in emergency so fast its called THE SCUD.

Wax jobs are his speciality, from red to special blue
Swix, Rex and Toko plus, just to name a few
Hours before each classic race he?ll analyse the snow
Then decide without fail that, Red Klister is the go.

Summer spring and autumn he worships at the shrine
Of Ulvang, Svan and Evans, all virtually divine,
For skating is a religion, Bjorn Daehlie the high priest
Devotees watch the video twice a day at least.

He approaches each off season with fanatical zeal
No pain no gain his motto, its hard to see the appeal
Of roller skiing up the hills, the snow gods to appease,
Then crash and burn down again, gashing his hands and knees.

Gabby is his greatest fan and helps him on his quest
To win a World Masters race, before hes laid to rest
For age has got him by the balls and just begun to squeeze
So spare a thought for Wasza, a champion on skis.

Birkenbiners and Loppets, its the long distance game
He skied a Wassa Loppet simply because of the name
And just when you were wondering, if this was all a show
Hes ranked twenty two nationally, in case you didn?t know.

Now the rot is setting in, he drives a Subaru
To keep alive the image no other car would do
The yuppie snowmobile, it says it loud and clear
Im a serious skier and Ive got serious gear.

For when all is said and done, more is said than done
And how you look is integral to being Number One
The super-hero suit for flights of fantasy?
Red and yellow, slinky blue, its retro seventies.

For Wasza is a racer as everybody knows
Dressed up in his lycra suit from head down to his toes
Everywhere that Wasza goes the crowds are bound to cheer
For hes the fashion statement of this Millennium year.

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